Posts Tagged With: free shit

Horny Hogs Terrorizing the Territory !!

If you were to believe the NT news that is ! I must admit where would this blog be without them ? Last week it was spa bathing buffalo , this week its a couch lovin’ pig !

As always when I arrive for work each morning at Hot 100 I collect the morning papers to hand out to all the freebie huntin’ masses of Darwin. I flick through the paper while I wait for the station to call for my location . Today when I got to page 3 I absolutley pissed myself laughing ….


This furniture lovin’ piggy was spotted yesterday in a suburb of Darwin having sex with an armchair in the middle of the road. Now this sort of thing happens all the time out in the bush , but Darwin is a ‘capital city’ as one witness told the paper ( calling Darwin a city might be going a little far – maybe one day but I’m pretty sure to be a city you need to have shitloads of people living there). Last year the NT news ran a story about Horny Harry , a pet pig living in the community of Gunbalanya , NT who had a loving relationship with wheelie bins and thinks he is a camp dog … Harry’s owner caught the piglet 2 or 3 years ago as a pet for his daughter. He maintains Harry is just an ordinary pig who sometimes knocks over bins . Another resident added in “yeah and then he fucks ’em”. Charming !


Harry Trotter and his pack of adoring camp dogs PIC : MICHAEL FRANCHI

Categories: bush, Darwin, entertainment, funny, Humor, News, newspaper, Only in the Territory, radio, WTF | Tags: , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

Donuts on a diet , Payphones and Blonde Moment # 357855

A common Telstra phone box

A common Telstra phone box (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

Donuts on a diet , Payphones and Blonde Moment # 357855

Today started off great. I woke up early , had enough time to actually enjoy my coffee and for once had a hassle free drive to the Hot 100 office. I let my self in with my newly acquired key (up until 2 days ago I had to knock on the back door for ages before anyone heard me and let me in). I loaded the van with milk , newspapers and free passes to every bloody event happening in Darwin this weekend. I then made my way to the bakery to pick up the donuts and cakes that taunt me every morning . I have to give them away along with all the other free stuff and no I can’t even sneak any for myself because I am a girl so of course I’m on a permanent diet (well I try but lets face it my love affair with steak and red wine always see’s me falling off the wagon )

The temptation I face on a daily basis .. It’s not easy I tell ya 😉 pic:

I managed to get all of this done with plenty of time to spare so I made my way out to the furthest suburb from the city – which coincidentally is also where I live so I gave myself a pat on the back for going so far out of my way not once but twice 😉

Any-hoo I arrived to my destination with 15 mins to spare so I had plenty of time to read over my new script and organize all the free shit. With 7 mins before going to air I went to get my phone so I was ready when they called. I looked through my bag – no phone .. Ok don’t panic I told myself , It’s probably in the back of the van. I searched the entire van , still no phone …………

FAAAAARRRRRKKK was pretty much all I could say for the next 5 mins as I drove at a million miles an hour to the nearest pay phone. By this time I should have been on air doing my little spiel but no , instead I was at a pay phone calling Telstra directory trying to get the number for the studio. The first number I got no one would pick up. The next number I called was some old dude’s home phone and finally on the third call Sarah from Hot 100 answered .. thank god. So I did my cross this morning from a pay phone outside the post office . Yep like a pro 😉

When I got back into the station I dropped in to see Tom and Sarah and we had a bit of a laugh about the whole thing .. Tom said he wanted to put this song on air in my honor …

Categories: Darwin, entertainment, funny, humour, radio, WTF | Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | 4 Comments

Nailed it !

A few weeks ago I wrote a post about my upcoming trial with a commercial Darwin radio station and how I was scared I would totally screw up. Well I totally nailed it !!  They offered me a job driving ‘ Black Betty ‘ a black van loaded with free shit – except on air obviously I have to say ‘free stuff ‘  😉

I almost blew it last Thursday when I was supposed to go in for training at 6.45 am …… and woke up at 7.15 am. Not good when you haven’t even officially started ! Luckily its Darwin and everyone is pretty chilled up here. Matty , the guy I was supposed to meet at 6.45am , kindly offered to meet me yesterday instead .

There is no excuse for 5 and a half hours late .. unless you have been kidnapped by Zoo animals and have a Gazelle dancing on your chest .. hey I ve been in weirder situations 😉   (audio is fine after 2 sec’s)

I was so wound up I woke up at 2am and scared of missing the alarm again was lying in bed wide awake until 5.30 am. Last night was even worse , I awoke at 1.30 am and again could not get back to sleep. Finally I managed to drift off only to have a terrible nightmare which involved me waking up at 7am to a phone call from my new boss yelling at me that I was crap and he no longer wanted me to work for him.

Luckily this did not happen in real life and I managed to get through my first Hot 100 crossover without swearing once.

Yay for me.

Categories: Darwin, entertainment, funny, humour | Tags: , , , , , , , | 13 Comments

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